The Cosmic Nut Roll

Most people have some kind of theory about where everything came from and where it’s going. Probably, for most people, this involves some kind of creation by some kind of higher power and some kind of universal destination, also guided by that higher power.

I’m not a religious person, but I still have a theory. If you have no sense of toleration or sense of humor, read no further. Go off somewhere else and read something else, possibly somebody else’s theory of life, the universe and everything.

I’d recommend the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series of books, since that’ll at least give you a definite answer.

On to my theory. The universe is an immensely large nut roll. Maybe a Pay Day bar, or possibly a Russel Stover Vermont Fudge Log. But a nut roll.

There isn’t any such thing as a beginning to this nut roll, and there isn’t any end to it either. Those concepts make no sense. It’s the nut roll. There isn’t anything else. There isn’t any time either. Your entire existence is within a portion of the nut roll. Your life line occupies a given volume or length of the nut roll. You can see backward in your nut roll segment but not,  for most people, forward. Such is a nut roll.

A few people occupy part of the outside layer of the nut roll, where the nuts form an irregular surface. This enables some people to see both directions in the nut roll, since they’re a nut that sticks up above the rest. (Now don’t go all awkward on me here and ask how these nuts can stick up above the nut roll if the nut roll is all that there is. Work with me on this.)

You aren’t ever born and you don’t ever die. You just occupy a portion of the nut roll, in some state or another.

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